Darshän Beauty

Tuesday, December 23, 2008
The Gift of RECEIVING

I have a confession to make this holiday season-I love receiving gifts. I believe it is just as fun to receive gifts, as it is to give them. I am sure I stand alone in this greedy little confession, because conventional wisdom says it is better to give than receive. I used to cringe at the thought of revealing this, and I have gone to great lengths on occasion to act as if it were not true. I used to pray daily to receive things, opportunities, or attention, but you would never know it by the way I responded to what came my way. For a long time, whatever I received, whether it was a compliment, a major accomplishment, or an actual item, I would push it away, as if I did not believe that I was worthy of good things, and the truth was that on some level that was exactly how I felt about myself.

Here are some examples of my typical response to such answered prayers: "Helen, you look nice in that dress!"..."Oh this old thing, I hate the way it shows my love handles". "I enjoyed the talk you gave last night"....."Oh, I heard myself stutter three times and I left out one of the points I was trying to make". "Mom, you can have my last piece of candy.".... "Oh no, you go ahead and eat it, I don't need it".

The first thing that pops out at me is how much I tended to fight the gifts I longed to receive. The second thing is that I say oh way too much. There is only one response necessary to these acts of kindness, and that is to simply say "thank you". This is something that I have successfully taught myself to do. Why is receiving graciously so hard for many of us? Why do we keep pushing away the things that bring us the most joy?

The SIMPLE TRUTH is that giving and receiving are both necessary in your life to be truly balanced. Receiving fills the well of wholeness within us. If we only give, the well dries up. Also, if we feel on deeper levels that we are unworthy of our dreams and desires coming true, then we will not attract to us the individuals and opportunities that we say we long for. We must learn to say "I am worth it!" or "I am as deserving as anyone else in the world!" Of course, too much receiving without giving back is unhealthy and leads to a pattern of hoarding energy, which turns into greed and that was one of my silent fears.

To be fully present at the moment of receiving feeds not only you, but the giver at the same time. The act of acknowledgement and appreciation for the grandest gift or even the smallest act of kindness fulfills the energy exchange and blesses both individuals. To push away a genuine gift of expressed love, in whatever form, stifles the flow of gifts waiting in line from the universe for you to receive.

Practicing being present each day opens us up to all the gifts that life brings, including valuable lessons learned. Being fully present in the moment of receiving and experiencing the union of love that it presents to us is the greatest gift we can give ourselves this year. It is time to free our souls to live a powerfully balanced life. And there is no time like the present.

Darshan Beauty invites you to share your most precious experiences of receiving.

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